Welcome to the Bip Report.
"Davis Update (not Cowville)"
The Bip Report is known for it's up to the minute reports on new things about former classmates and present classmates and whatnot. In the past, we've discussed Mun's continued reign of pimpdom (you know it Mun) and Sky Milner's unkown "Travel the USA" whereabouts. Today we will discuss Davis Kurihara-Nakasu. Some of us may remmeber Davis. Davis was kicked out in Sophomore year for stealing Ryan Auyoung's car. Davis was last seen in Hawaii attending Mid-Pacific Institute. At Mid-Pac, he earned a sizable reputation for "thugging" which allowed him to recieve a significant ovation during his commencement ceremonies. Davis was also seen participating in Wes "Wes Side til I die" Pei's famed car racing organization "Monkey Time." In Monkey Time, Davis raced his souped up Acura Integra to many a victory against less superior motor vehicles. Perhaps his opponents cars were too slow, did not have enough bass, or simply not lowered enough. Davis then went on to become partially deaf due to excessive music playing.
Davis now attends the University of Puget Sound. Nani Apo has reported that Davis is "a cool guy" and always smokes out (or up, depending on which coast you are on).
But why mention Davis now? Well, our very own Brent Tamaru, one of the Bip Report's greatest sources, has reportedly seen Davis. Davis apparently has a car here to. Brent failed to report whether this was also a souped up Acura Integra. Brent goes to school in Seattle. I'm not up on my Washington geography, so I don't know where that is in relation to Puget Sound. What was Davis doing there, though? Why was he looking for a phone? The only answer was that he was in search of a drug dealer and/or clients. That is my Davis report.
"Emily Chang Report"
While I'm at it, I should include a little report about Emily Chang, who came to visit Berkeley last week. I was going to write about this earlier, but I forgot because my mind was rendered totally useless from stupid Calculus.
Emily goes to Harvard. She had her finals just the week before, and then she had a one week break. During this week, she came to Berkeley to visit Ward and possibly Gayna. Anyway, I saw her at Gayna's place, along with Ward. I was doing math homework, so I wasn't involved in any of the talking and whatnot, but I did come out in time to see Emily battling Ward. In my humble opinion, it looked like Ward won. But in the end, we were all losers, because the battle created such a ruckuss as to arouse the dreaded "Par" from her lair down below. Like a hideous troll, coming out to eat her hapless victims above, Par came knocking on the door. "Damn you!" she hollered to us all. "Cursed little brats! Stop your talking before I am forced to devour you all!" Frightened by this, I quickly slammed the door shut on her. Ward and Emily were most likely frightened as well. Even theh Evil Gayna was afraid looking. None can compare to the sheer power of Par.
"Ski Trip"
Now for the ski trip. We went to Lake Tahoe. Heavenly to be exact. This was the first time I have been skiing in 7 years. The last time I went skiing, me and Abe were masters of the slopes. Of course we were like 12 years old, but still yet, no slope in Korea was safe from us. We even went down frickin moguls and black diamonds. We even went down a slope that was closed off, due to rocks coming out of the ground and crap.
But much has changed. 7 years is a lot of time to grow in, so it remained to be seen how much of this skill I had kept.
We had adventures getting to the slopes, but we got there. Most of the people wanted to snow board. Ooo, look at us snow boarders! We're cool! Look at those losers with skis. You aren't cool like us snow boarders. But by the end of a day of falling on their asses, the snow boarders were quieted, and me, Greg, and to a certain degree, Reese, stood triumphant over them. AHHAHAHAHA. Us three had good adventures up and down, and went to the California/Nevada border on the slopes. We had decent views at 10,000 feet up. The skiing itself was pretty fun. Except for I fell down twice. Once trying to get my 3 inches of air off a lone mogul. Unfortunately, the mogul was made of pure powder, so I ended up getting my skis stuck, thrown off my skis, and sliding down a couple feet. The second fall was just a little out of control, and a little my thighs were dead at the end of the day. Greg however ruled the slopes. His one fall came from like stepping funny, and falling down. But even though Greg proved to be technically superior, I won the speed race.
Abe, you know about the race. It is the bread and butter of our skiing days. Reckless abandon.
"After Ski Trip"
We stayed in this little cabin guy. I would have to say the highlight of the after ski trip was Mike Yang. Mike is always the highlight whenever alcohol is involved. But this time, Mike outdid himself. In none but his boxers, Mike jumped out into the snow, and made snow angels. Oh, and also present at the ski trip was Michelle Cheng, Kyle's sister. Michelle gets the Bip Report, and this was the first time she realized who I was.
Mike was rivaled only by Kamehameha freshwoman Kamaile, who drank her weight in beer. Once it started hitting her, she was pretty funny.
Since Bip, Carey, Mona, Mariel, and Priscilla don't drink, we pretty much just watched them all. Carey was more or less occupied the whole night with Mike Yang's card trick. Now you see it, now you don't. Now you see it, now you don't. Woo hoo Carey!
I did play one game of kings, but the game ended the round that I joined.
That is pretty much the after ski trip. Oh, and I kicked Gayna's ass. Although Gayna says she pinned me, this was after she gave up from a body scissors, and I just started lying down, at which point she jumped on me, thus "pinning" me. And then I did the "Ricky vs. Scott" thing to her, where I hold her down by lying on my back on top of her.
"Trip Home"
The trip home was a race against the clock. The Super Bowl clock. Reese, being a great Broncos fan, was very eager to get back. But it wasn't going to happen. That's why I have a portable TV.
"Super Bowl highlights"
The Super Bowl wasn't too great, considereing I didn't really care who won. Still yet, it is essential to watch. Here are my picks for the highlights. Sure I could say that Elway's 80 yard TD was a highlight. Or the Atlanta runback was a highlight. But the real highlight would have to have been the Bronco guy that did the dirty bird followed by a
D-X chop to the Atlanta sideline.
The greatest commercial would of course have to be the WWF commercial. How was that? Decent, no? My only regret is missing the WWF halftime show.
The worst thing is, as expected, the Progressive Aut Insurance Halftime show featuring ET. You stupid s--- Progressive! I f---in boycott you! Everyone, Boycott Progressive!!!!!!
"I forgot"
I forgot to write about what I was supposed to write about on Friday. I'll do it tomorrow. Riiiiight.
Until next time, diamonds are forever, and so is skiings superiority over snowboarding.
BIP