Welcome to the Bip Report.
"The Fang Issue"
Okay. I think I was possibly too exaggerating yesterday. However, I will be taking action. My new plan is simple. I will write Fang a nice note. At first glance, it will look like a Thank You note, and have nice flowery language. But it ends with, "And for all you have given me, I must give you something back. I will now beat the s--- out of you as soon as you put this paper down and look up." I wrote it out all nicely and everything. Then I plan to rail him in the stomach, causing him to topple over. At this point, I will take Josh's suggestion and do a hockey style shirt pull-over, followed by a nice front head-lock/snap down manuever. After a little choking out, I switch it over to the legs. This is were I take a little from John Wong, and beat his legs until he cannot walk. I am also thinking I want to employ the dreaded "Sky Milner" attacks, including chins and elbows in the back and anywhere. Along with a Sky-like mentality, which is that of an escaped psychopath. Then I add my own idea. It is more on the lines of a prank than on actual violence. On second thought, I don't think I should do any permanent damage to him. So Joey, your idea is out. I don't think I'd could ever do that to anyone. That is like the worst thing that can happen to you. I have this unnatural fear of losing teeth. I've had nightmares about losing teeth. So yeah, no curb biter.
Anyway, after beating Fang's legs, I plan to have some rope. I will rope him up in fetal position, or close to it. Then I may drag him down the stairs, and dump him into a trash can outside, and tie the trash can shut. Sort of a variation on Stone Cold's idea. However, as Scott knows full well, the trash cans in Berkeley are choke small. So maybe I will have to use the trash can in our bathroom. It won't be as good, but Fang is a tall guy, and I don't think it's possible for me to stuff him into one of the curbside trash cans. I don't know what to do after that. Eventually, he will get out of the trash can. I hope he won't be able to walk at this point, so he would pose no threat to me while I'm sleeping. I think as I'm beating his legs, I'll take his keys, so that he's locked out for the night. Hopefully he'll spend the night in the trash can, but this is unlikely. Someone will eventually free him. Sigh.
"Still Open"
I want to hear from people like Mark Pang or Reid. I'm sure you folks have some good ideas on what could be done.
"How to Antagonize"
I'm thinking maybe I should cut weight prior to this. That way, I'll be choke irritable, and I'll have a helluva lot of rage when I do everything. It's like, I don't know, naturally generated speed or something. Except I'll be very tired when I do it. So its a trade-off. Oh well.
"Math Problems"
Okay, I believe that the answer to the question I posed is that it is indeed a square from the top. At first, I thought to flip the object on its side. Then its like a cube with funny sides. The top would be a square with a hollow middle, and it would be raised at the corners. But the teacher said you can't flip the shape. So it's a frickin square. I think it was dumber without being able to flip it. But whatever. Some people in the class and me actually constructed this thing with erasers and paper, just to check. So yes, it is a square.
"Hey, I seen Bret Heilig"
After coming out of math, I had a most rare find indeed. None other than Bret Heilig. And guess who I saw him with? It was a girl. A short oriental girl, and I must say, she was not too bad looking. She was small kine decent in fact. I was bewildered. Where is this coming from? Add this to Big Mun, who is already on girlfriend number 2, and I am led to feel that I am getting worked here in Berkeley. Mun, please explain the secrets of macking to me. I am yet a begginer, and have much to learn from your wisdom.
Greg, I feel this is a direct challenge to our manhood. We cannot allow everyone else to be getting girlfriends here, and have us sitting in the dark. If this continues, I may take on Fang-like tendencies, if you smell what I'm cooking.
More or less, I'm saying I am desperate at this moment. Does anyone want to hook me up? Anybody? The situation is dire. Greg, we are being showed up like hell. This must not continue.
"Me and Jay-D got it locked crazy"
Jay, I spoke with David today. I have instructions and whatnot. Now it is your tie to give me the info. When are you leaving that day? D says 5. My final ends at 11. We have 6 hours. What is the transportation deal? I have the way to get there, but if you are having a car or something, that is preferable. Tell me. Also, where am I going to meet you? Outside my class? In my room? Where? Explain this to me.
And that's all for today. Until next time, diamonds are forever, and so is..beatdown!
BIP